Before I get back into posting regularly, I want to lay some things out about the what-how-why of this blog. Another mini-update is at the end.
If you have been following this blog for a while (or if you’ve read the About the Author page), then you know that my original intention for this blog was to post updates on my life in Germany, so that people back home could keep up. It has also been great for me to go back and reference trips I made, so that I can quickly find the photos or details about where I went, such as names of places and whatnot.
The blog has been great for both of those things, but I stopped posting for several years. This is because of a few main reasons.
First, I got busy. I mean, I was always busy, but the early stages of projects are usually the ones I stick with the best, and so I posted semi-regularly on this blog up until right when I moved back. I still have 3 or 4 posts from things that happened at the end of my year abroad that I would like to write, and hopefully I will. We’ll see.
Second, and the main reason is that I overthink things…waayyy too much. I regularly waffle between wanting to post all about my life, and wanting to take down the blog entirely.
This is because sometimes I want to share my photos and stories with the world, and I want to write out my thoughts because it feels therapeutic. For me, it’s not about who’s reading it, it’s about me writing it. It organizes my photos and memories, and it’s fun to look back on and reminisce.
However, I also feel…arrogant? for lack of a better word. Sometimes I feel like having a personal blog says “oh, look at me, I’m so important and interesting that I have to have a whole site for my fans to check in on me because I’m far too fabulous to talk to people individually.”
This mindset bugs the crap out of me, because then I think about some of the people that I love dearly but don’t talk to on a weekly basis, and I know that I would enjoy seeing what they’re up to and reading about their experiences. So, having a negative outlook about me doing that, while knowing that I would react positively if it was just someone else doing it, tells me that I need to stop judging myself so much and just do it.
So, here we are! I’m honestly probably gonna keep waffling about this blog internally, but I’m gonna try to post anyway. If anything, I’ll call it an exercise in pushing myself out of my comfort zone.
(Yes, I know I made a very similar post two years ago, but that didn’t really help me with my problem very much. Just goes to show you how waffle-y and indecisive I can be.)
Anyway, here’s a little update: I turned 27 last Wednesday, and my mom took my partner and I wine tasting at Artesa winery in Napa, and then to browse the Sunset Demonstration Gardens in Sonoma. Then later that evening after some sushi, Kyle and I went and played board games with some dear friends, who surprised me with some delicious tiramisu. It was a lovely day 😀